'wake up, O sleeper, rise from the dead, and Christ will shine on you.'

'i hope that last things last past these first charms, these pale charms.', 'last things last' by rachel's band. this will be a random and odd post, but hey... i think that way. but i listened to this song by rachel's and i was thinking about my prayer life lately... i'm at the point i always get to. that point being where my prayer time 'feels like i'm talking to a brick wall.' so God i hope my passion and want for you goes 'past these first charms, these pale charms.' that it will last through my 'pale charms.' which brings me on to the next song quote and realization of who i am now compared to who i used to be.... i used to count on me and no You Lord.

'And Your skin taste much better with aging not sweet like it was back in our sunday school.' this song is by manchester orchestra and it's entitled 'now that you're home.' i never was a sunday school kid, per-say. but it stands, Jesus you grow with age and wisdom. divine wisdom. i read the bible with new eyes and my heart sees with a new passion, a burning passion of how i will look, but how you look through me Lord. not saying it isn't rough, but oh how Your glory shines Lord. in the Psalms david asks 'where are you Lord?' many times like i do... and here you were the whole time, right here. now where was i?

'wake up, O sleeper, rise from the dead, and Christ will shine on you.'

here I am Lord, O here i am... all for You Lord. continuing after You. i know you are here, because before i didn't know where you weren't. that hasn't changed, You haven't changed. I love You Man.

a little crazy, i talk to myself.

i find it odd how people who come to Christ later in life describe Jesus as this 'madman'.
but he was, His people are very odd... ahaha heck, one guy (by one guy, john the baptist. That guy.) sat in the desert and ate locust. we are called to hang out with the lepers, even be lawyers while doing it. the idea of being 'set apart' has taken all knew meaning.

i will choose to love, that's it. simply love today and when the sun will rise tomorrow, i shall do it again. i am loved to show love, i am loved to know love... we love each other to fully understand His love.

there is just this thing going on in my head now, that a personal relationship with Jesus is so much more real when i don't try to do this (living) all alone. because the humanity of Christ is always doing things together, as the body. even God did this with us, i mean i started understanding more when i took in the idea that Jesus suffered here on earth and did the trials. as if He is saying, 'me too.' God had the Holy Spirit come upon us to say, 'I am here with you.' God is here and with me, i can talk to Him, interact with Him and at some point see all that He is doing in my life. i think we only understand Gods' love once we experience loving others... it may be why it's so important to love our neighbors and love each other as He so loves us. the loving i show here is only a glimpse of His divine love and what awaits us in Heaven. by loving the least of these and our brothers and sisters, we get a peek at what Heaven will be. a nice dose of Gods love for us. how I love my best friend is nothing on how much God loves me. how i love a significant other, is nothing in comparison to how much He loves me. the happiness i see is a glimpse of what Heaven will be like. by all that has been shown, oh how my love increases for You... even to that how i realize how much i love all of these people around me. there are still differences and frustration, but really everything at the foot of the cross is level. sometimes i get frustrated, but i hope it's a frustration of love and i don't act on such things. that i love all people and not for my benefit of looking better, because 'i am the problem' my ego and pride, my stubbornness. don't let these things bother me when trying to bring Your kingdom, i do it for you and for no one else to see. 'make it so my right hand doesn't know what the left is doing.' i love you Man.





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random.. thing.

there is an app. (application, i know you know that but 'app' annoys me) for pretty much everything on the iPhone, except the one that makes it less pretentious.

personal journalism time...